Posted by: slugboy77 | February 17, 2013

Portal guns, Theism and a lack of belief.

Its late, im watching alien versus predator requiem, I have dubstep on in the background, I have had a couple of beers and I was playing Portal (2 to be exact, player created levels). In other words im happy and relaxed.

I was sat there thinking of all the really cool things I could do with a portal gun. Some of the things I could even discuss with a vicar!.

A particularly good one was painting a portal onto a big metal square. And having it fired off as fast as possible away from earth. The entrance portal would be at the bottom of a silo, which I would fill with waste. Landfill stuff, or nuclear reactor waste, copies of katie price unsold biographies and copies of the casual vacancy rather than pulping them. All obviously at a small cost (this would be a business not a charity).

Now the great thing is that the vacuum of space would suck this rubbish out, so the whole thing would be self sustaining. Rubbish in = rubbish out, to use the computer modellers analogy incorrectly.

The waste is no longer on earth, the vacuum would fire it away from the portal into space, id be getting paid handsomely. Win Win, win

In case you were wondering, this is actually going somewhere.

Id really like to have a portal gun, they are awesome. So very awesome. But I don’t have one.


Id like one so much it would be great if I could make one, maybe if I thought they could be made?

Maybe if I just believe they can be?

Just believe……



I just cant get myself to believe that this thing I really really want is possible, even if only theoretically make-able by upright apes on a dirtball. Its just not happening.

Now the mildly tortuous twist. Belief is an odd thing, I see it in others but I don’t have it myself.

Now im not just talking about belief in fictitious sci fi game devices. But in ‘bigger’ stuff like gods.

Heaven, now there is a god based concept! meeting my maker and all those friends and family members who have passed on again, glorious bliss, on tap virgins (version specific), my own cloud, finally being able to play a string instrument, access to actual flaming swords, wings and manna and oh yeah, everlasting life. Why wouldn’t I want to believe in that? Sounds like a sweet deal. Follow a few rules, basically don’t act like a dick for 70 or so years and Roberts your mothers brother!

But I don’t believe. Never have, not even for a day, a minute… I swear to god I haven’t!

So what is belief?

I pretty much have no idea. The concept as does the practice. Eludes me. Hell, I cant even get myself to believe in a white gun that fires pretty ovals……

I have very early memories, of arguing with nursery nurses who wanted the group to do their daily pray for a few mins (a crude ploy to get a few mins peace and quiet at work I understand now, but i lacked the vocab and linguistic skills at the time to debate further than ‘no im not praying’) I could see I was getting conned even then. That somehow this whole religion and gods thing was bumfodder.

It isn’t even as if I came from an openly atheist family. My mother and sisters notably religious and father towed the party line even if he was part way between agnostic and bible bother-er.

But as it was my brains software obviously had a decent copy of its version of avast or avg on-board as the memes about gods and religion (I chose memes over mind viruses as the latter set a derogatory tone a bit low for my first post) failed to take root.

This has however left me mildly perplexed as to how someone can simply accept something that to me seems so astoundingly laughable, especially nowadays with education allowing us to read the bible and spot its inconsistencies, to see the natural world and understand its truth and beauty.

Yes, im sure it could be comforting to people who have had loss, or are reaching the end of their life, or require a reason to not be alcoholics, or  who just won’t or can’t think for themselves and prefer the little mental hug religion must give.

but merely believing in something without external evidence, which is not internally consistent, just because you really really really want it to be true does not, as Picard would say “make it so”


However I can see how in some ways its simpler  than having to understand all the complex parts of science that make god unnecessary.

but simplicity isn’t automatically reality, nor is it truth,

lets face it, Portals are simple too,

“speedy thing goes in, speedy thing comes out”



  1. Felt so hopeless looking for answers to my qu.enionss..uttil now.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: